Here's an idea, dumbass: DON'T GET A DOG - AT ALL

There are several things in this world that make me crazy, yes.  But one that REALLY sends me over the edge is irresponsible pet ownership.  I learned today from The Daily News of a new "pet" service called Flexpetz.  It is an organization that houses, feeds and cares for several dogs that are available to be rented out to people for certain periods of time due to that person's busy schedule.  This programmed is designed for people who can answer "yes" to the following questions (taken from the company's website):

"Do you wish you and your children could spend time with a dog you know, for a few hours or days each month, knowing that someone else takes care of the dog's day-to-day needs? Are you prepared to take spend at least a few hours a month with a dog? Are you prepared to have a FLEXPETZ Educator spend an hour (Dora talking - AN HOUR??) with you when you first take out a FLEXPETZ dog? Are you prepared to treat a FLEXPETZ dog with the same love and respect as if the dog was your own? And would you feel even better if such a program helped dogs in need of rescuing or re-homing?"

- you can't give a dog the full-time attention it needs?
- you travel away from home on a regular basis?
- dog ownership restrictions where you live prevent you and your family from owning a dog?

THEN DON'T GET A DOG!!!!!!!!!!  AT ALL!

OK, deep breath, calm down, Dora. 

To give these people the benefit of the doubt, I did try to think of the upside to a service such as this.  The only GOOD thing I can think of is that at least these dogs, most of whom have been abandoned, now have a place to go.  And that yes, there are gazillions of shitty dog owners in this country who have no business owning a dog so maybe this would be better.  But these dogs already have homes.  And what sort of twisted, screwed up logic would you have to use to justify taking an animal that has been abandoned or abused and handing them off to person to person and from location to location, etc.  They also say that because they are charging people an arm and leg to join this service, that will weed out the people with casual interests....????  What?  They are clearly serving people with casual interests. 

They also advertise that they have several branches all over the world, and I quote, "And here’s another great FLEXPETZ feature: your FLEXPETZ membership is valid at any FLEXPETZ location. Just imagine visiting New York, Chicago, Paris or London and strolling through the city and parks with a FLEXPETZ dog!"  [fake laugh]  Ha ha ha!  Oh that's just GREAT.
      
Holy Mother of Cesar Milan what ever happened to allowing dogs to have the respect, dignity and consistency of a real home, a family, a pack to belong to which they deserve?  These dogs may be trained and well cared for and the clients may be, generally speaking, decent, "responsible" people but whaaaaa?  If you are not interested in creating an honest, lifetime bond with a dog OR a consistent temporary home for a foster dog that will soon be moving someplace permanent then I have to question your ethical dedication to animals.  I mean, what is the POINT?

I'm glad to hear that animal rights activists and the Humane Society of the US are up in arms about this.  They are hitting on the basics of why a service like this is a bad idea.  Not all people use the same words/commands such as "leave it",  "down", "stand", "up", "no", "get the fuck outta the garden!", etc.  The service claims they work with each client to use consistent methods of training but COME ON.  These are people that don't even care or know enough to see that a dog needs a place in this world.  Whether it's keeping feet and laps warm, greeting customers at a store, begging at the table, running crazy circles in THEIR yard, in THEIR territory - dogs deserve a family, a place.  Dogs are not property, they are not toys, they are not accessories - they are family.